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July 7, 20254 min readDave Scherrer

Forgiveness as an Act of Humility

A deep conversation about the difficulty of forgiveness, featuring a moving story of a friend wrestling with whether he must forgive his father for deep personal hurt.

Forgiveness as an Act of Humility

This is Dave Scherrer and this is a Backyard Conversation, found here at the blog posts of 100 Fold Ministries. I invite you into a not so casual conversation on one of the more difficult subjects that humanity can face. A subject that is difficult for both believers in Jesus and those who do not believe in Jesus:

Forgiveness!

In my recent podcasts found at Kingdom Offerings on our 100 Fold Ministries website homepage, we have been looking at the Kingdom Disciplines. My most recent podcast post is about the discipline of forgiveness, a huge Kingdom principle. So, the idea of forgiveness has been on my heart.

And now coincidently, just a few days ago, I had a conversation with a friend and he shared with me a story of deep personal hurt committed against him by his father. I sat numb as he shared for over an hour. Then he asked me a yes or no question:

"Do I have to forgive my Father for what he did to me?"

He went on...

"I know what Jesus said. I've actually done a bit of study on this. I've read in the Lord's prayer where it says that we are to pray: 'Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.' I also know that Jesus forgave those who crucified Him from the cross. Still, what do you think? Do I have to forgive my father?"

I was quiet. For quite a while.

This Backyard Conversation is a hard one. We are going to spend a couple of conversations here to even touch, not so much even scratch, the surface of the monumental idea of forgiveness.

I hazarded a non-answer...

"What do you think is expected of a person to forgive?"

He was quiet. For quite a while.

"I'm not sure. I am sure that it will be impossible to forgive and forget. If that is the formula, then I am done for."

I tossed out one more thought:

"Christ carried the scars of the cross into heaven with His resurrected body. Jesus forgave but the scars remained as a reminder."

I went on: "Do you think Jesus needed to be reminded of the circumstances of his torture and death? I doubt it. I think He forgave but He did not forget. The scars are there, I think, so that we don't forget."

"No I suppose that's true," he offered back.

I remembered to myself of a George MacDonald quote I had once memorized:

"Forgiveness is the giving, and so the receiving, of life." — George MacDonald

Then he said without a smile:

"So, back to my question - Do I have to forgive my father?"

I thought to myself that the Bible seemed clear on the matter. Quite clear:

Ephesians 4:32

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."

Colossians 3:13

"Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

Matthew 6:14-15

"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

Still... Forgiveness is a very high bar with eternal consequences in the balance. That is why I call this the world's most dangerous prayer:

"Father, forgive me my debts as I forgive my debtors."

Let's talk about this some more. This is Backyard Conversations and I welcome your thoughts at Dave@100foldministries.org. Peace!

Dave Scherrer

Dave Scherrer

Founder of 100 Fold Ministries, dedicated to advancing the Gospel of the Kingdom.

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Dave Scherrer

100 Fold Ministries

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